


To Lay This Body Down

by Narutwink



Series: Long Time Traveler [4]
Category: Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables - All Media Types, Les Misérables - Schönberg/Boublil, Les Misérables - Victor Hugo
Genre: F/M, Funeral, General sadness for now, M/M, modern day AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-01
Updated: 2013-08-01
Packaged: 2017-12-22 01:59:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/907544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narutwink/pseuds/Narutwink
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Enjolras saw was red. All he felt was hate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Lay This Body Down

Enjolras was stoic. He hadn’t shown any expression since the EMT’s made him stay in the waiting area while Grantaire went into surgery. Combeferre had gone to get him coffee and Courfeyrac was pacing while Jehan tried to calm his nerves by holding his hand as he paced. Bahorel was finally on his way to the hospital after spending hours looking for the shooter or anyone associated with him. Eponine had called all of her shady and less than redeemable acquaintances to see if the underground had any information. 

 

They did not right now, but Montparnasse was well on his way to finding out. Eponine had known Montparnasse since childhood and they each had known Grantaire since grade school. Although Montparnasse hadn’t seen Grantaire in nearly two years he was not going to let some bastard get away with this. 

 

Eponine was beginning to go to shambles. She wasn’t crying but she was slowly losing composure. Combeferre had can come back with coffee as she was about to throw a canned drink at a nurse for not being able to see Grantaire. 

 

“’Ponine. It’s alright, _it will be alright_. Sit down and breathe deeply.” Combeferre says, taking her hands after handing Enjolras his coffee. 

 

Joly was still covered in Grantaire’s blood. He had gotten most of it off his hands with Bossuett’s help. He was currently shaking against Bossuett’s shoulder fighting an oncoming panic attack. Musichetta was rubbing circles into his back and trying to soothe him. 

 

Feuilly was on the phone with his job trying to stay off until everything with Grantaire was settled. Marius was holding Cosette’s hand and rubbing her back, Cosette was crying into her free hand. They had all been waiting for hours when Bahorel finally reached the hospital. Enjolras hadn’t moved from his position in the chair he had chosen except to drink his coffee and receive a new cup from Combeferre. 

 

When the nurse came in to the waiting area, the entirety of the Les Amis were on their feet. Enjolras’s heart was beating a thousand miles an hour and…something was wrong. The man wasn’t smiling and he had his hands folded in front of him. HE was frowning and it wasn’t out of anger, like it would have if Grantaire were making trouble wanting the Amis, to see him. 

 

“I am so very sorry, and there is no easy way to say this…” Eponine burst into tears and collapsed into Combeferre and Cosette began a wounded wailing. 

 

“Your friend, he has passed on. The bullet had hit a few to many vital organs and his body could not sustain itself.” Enjolras had stopped listening. Courfeyrac had fallen to ground crying and Jehan had him in his arms. 

 

All Enjolras saw was red. Blood, anger, hate. He wanted to kill. He wanted to choke life out of the person that did this. Enjolras clenched his fists, crushing the cup of full hot coffee all over his hand. He didn’t feel the pain, not yet. All he felt was anger. 

 

“You let him _DIE?_ This is a _FUCKING HOSPITAL._ THERE WAS NOTHING YOU COULD DO?”

 

“I…I’m sorry. The wound was just to much for his body to handle.”

 

“HE COULD HANDLE ANYTHING. YOU JUST DIDN’T DO YOUR JOBS RIGHT.” The Amis were watching this train wreck unfold. Enjolras raised his fist and punched the wall next to the nurse’s head and Bahorel grabbed Enjolras into a bear hug and dragged him, kicking and screaming, outside of the hospital. 

 

“BAHOREL. LET ME GO.”

 

“ _SHUT UP._ ” Bahorel hisses. 

 

Bahorel drops Enjolras on the ground. There was no one around and Enjolras jumped up and got ready to go back inside. Bahorel puts a hand on Enjolras’s chest to keep him in place. 

 

“ _Enjolras_. Stop. I know you’re lashing out so I’m going to leave you out here so you don’t hurt anyone, come back in when you’re ready.”

 

Bahorel leaves him and he could see Bahorel’s shoulders sag and shake slightly as he entered the building. Enjolras kicked a nearby trashcan and threw some empty glass bottles at the wall. He punched the brick wall in front of him and this time felt something crack and his hand began to bleed and he cursed. Then he collapsed and cried. He sobbed violently and loudly. He thanked Bahorel in his head because he didn’t want any of the Les Amis to see him like this. 

 

He stayed like that until Combeferre came to find him. He has no idea how long he sat out there, crying and bleeding. When Combeferre found him he wrapped a jacket around Enjolras and led him to his car. Combeferre had driven himself and Eponine and decided it would be best if they all stayed the night he and Enjolras’s apartment. 

 

Enjolras stayed silent all the way to the flat and went straight to his room and collapsed in his bed and cried again. He eventually cried himself to sleep and as he did so, he prayed it was all a nightmare. 

 

Combeferre had to fight every moral fiber that he had in his body the first night. As he held Eponine, one of the strongest people he knew and loved dearly, sobbing in his arms and listening to his best friend doing the same thing in the opposite room. He wanted to tell them all Grantaire was secretly fine and currently on a plane to Ireland. He wanted to tell them he is keeping everyone safe and they don’t have to mourn because he’ll come back, but he knew. Grantaire told him why he couldn’t.

 

“ _If you tell them,_ ” Grantaire had said, “ _Enjolras and Eponine will overturn the Earth to find me. They’ll tell everyone I wasn’t the leader and it will only continue the danger I’m trying to prevent._ ”

 

Combeferre understood, he was grateful to Grantaire but also furious with the situation. He held Eponine tighter as she cried and hoped she would fall asleep so she could escape this pain, at least for a little while. 

 

The next morning, Combeferre awoke to a wet shirt and Eponine, finally, sleeping. Her eyes were puffy and her breathing was shallow, but she was asleep. Combeferre placed a kiss to temple and moved to make some semblance of breakfast. He made eggs and coffee. He made Enjolras’s plate first and went to put it in his room only to find the door locked. Combeferre’s features softened and knocked lightly and said, 

 

“I made breakfast. I’ll sit it out here if you want it. Eggs and coffee.”

 

He goes back downstairs to make Eponine and himself a plate. On his way back to his room he noticed the plate and cup gone and he was able to smile a little. He enters his bedroom and Eponine is still sleeping so he sits next her and sets her food to the side and kissed her on the forehead. He did with enough force that it lightly woke her up. 

 

“Morning ‘Ponine.”

She blinked and nodded. He held her plate out for her and cuddled next to her. She ate silently and when she was finished she held Combeferre’s hand and sunk back into the blankets laid on his bed. Combeferre loved Eponine and he knew she may not be alright for months, maybe even a couple years if Grantaire wasn’t back yet, but he would stay with her. Always and forever. 

 

Enjolras had grabbed the food and locked his door back. Combeferre would come in and check on him if he didn’t. He ate a bite or two but he stomach wasn’t up for it so he stuck to drinking all of the coffee and getting in the shower. Enjolras didn’t pay much attention when he was in the shower. When he realized he had been staring at the wall for god knows how long he opted to simply sit down and he ended up falling asleep in there. Combeferre became worried when he realized he’s heard the shower going for two hours and put a fist to his friend’s door. 

 

“ENJOLRAS.” 

 

Combeferre was one to rarely raise his voice, if ever. So when he did it startled Enjolras enough to wake him up. It occurred to Enjolras that he might be in shock, he decided that he wasn’t because he could function, he was choosing not to. Enjolras finished is his shower quickly and pulled on some jeans and a t-shirt and opened the door to find Combeferre waiting for him. 

 

“I already know you’re not alright, so I’m not going to ask that. What I am going to ask you is do you need help? Do you need to talk, aspirin, anything?”

 

“No. Nothing will help right now. I just…I need to be alone.” 

 

“We will have to talk about it eventually.” He says softly. 

 

“Yeah, eventually.” Enjolras responds and shuts the door lightly. He collapsed back on his bed and closed his eyes. He knew sleep wouldn’t come to him so he tried to think about the good they had accomplished in past months and he shot up in his bed. 

 

It was his fault. Grantaire took the shot for him,

 

‘ _NO. I AM._ ’

 

The words rang through Enjolras’s head like a knife was splitting his skull. He had forgotten about everything and blocked it out the moments leading up to the gunman. Grantaire had stayed with him through all the political indecencies he was trying to change, even though most of the time he didn’t think anything would change. Yet, he followed Enjolras everywhere. Supporting him in his own way and finally, something really happened and Grantaire, who distanced himself so often, was gunned down for the progress they made. 

 

“COMBEFERRE.”

 

Combeferre sped over to Enjolras’s room to find him in bed with his head in his hands. 

 

“ _I’m going to be sick._ ”

 

Enjolras expels what little food he had in his stomach in to a miniature trashcan he had next to his bed. Combeferre rushes to get tums and several glasses of water. Enjolras spends the day like that, throwing up and periodically crying when Combeferre would leave for certain periods. When Combeferre was there he would silently rub his back and change the little trashcan bags. 

 

Combeferre really was Enjolras’s best friend and when he felt better he would tell him that.

 

Enjolras didn’t leave his apartment for days after the Grantaire’s “death.” He stayed holed up in his room in silence and he rarely spoke to even Combeferre. He was numb in mind and body and it wasn’t until Combeferre told Enjolras that Grantaire’s funeral would be in the next two days that he showed any emotion at all. 

“What?” 

“Grantaire’s funeral is Friday. That’s in two days…will you…be able to go?” Combeferre asks carefully. 

 

It was a valid question. Enjolras had to seriously think on it for a moment. Could he? YES. He had to. He loved Grantaire and if he were to dismiss him so simply and miss his funeral, then maybe Enjolras never loved him at all. So yes, he would go.

 

“I’ll be there. What time?” He asks, his voice sore. 

 

“One o’ clock. There...there is something you should know. There isn’t going to be a wake and it’s closed casket but…but we’re holding our own memorial service for him. We’re going to the bar after the funeral…you’re welcome to come if you can.”

 

Enjolras’s heart tightened. He wouldn’t even be able to see his face one last time. He’s sure Grantaire’s parents are the reason there wouldn’t be a wake, they didn’t want to pay for it and he knew that the law wouldn’t let him do anything about it. There was so much he still needed to fight for and now…now even more so. Grantaire will not have died for nothing. His death will not go and be forgotten. 

 

“I’ll join you…that idiot would want me too.” Enjolras says with a smile that held no actual happiness. 

 

“I suppose he would.”

 

Enjolras struggles merely getting out of bed on Friday morning but he forces himself to. He knows he needs too. He dresses in a red button down, Grantaire’s favorite. 

‘ _It makes your eyes pop and I mean, come on, red is a sexy color. Especially on you._ ’

Enjolras smiles thinking back on the night they had all gone to the movies together. They had been slightly late due to the shirt “being so sexy it had to come off.” He finishes getting ready thinking back on all the times he had mentioned the shirt and he was content that something as dumb as a shirt would make Grantaire so happy. He slips on black slacks and comes out to find Combeferre dressed in all black, as Enjolras technically should be. Combeferre lefts an eyebrow at him and Enjolras responds with, 

 

“He loved this shirt.”

 

Combeferre didn’t mention it again. They arrived at the church a few minutes before the service was to begin. It’s then that Enjolras notices something that doesn’t really belong at funerals. 

 

Confetti. There was confetti everywhere. There was a banner that had a giant picture of vodka on it. He also noticed that instead of Amazing Grace or some other heartfelt song, Free Bird was playing. The next song that began was a Black Veil Brides song, “It’s The End”, ironically. When Grantaire was on a kick, Enjolras was never really able to escape and fell in love with whatever it was Grantaire was listening too. He noticed that Grantaire’s Ipod was hooked up to the churches speakers. He was surprised, he guessed Courfeyrac, had been able to do this. It was so very…Grantaire. 

 

Enjolras had tears prickling his eyes but was able to suppress them when Courfeyrac gathered him into a hug. He smiled sadly at Enjolras and Jehan hugged him with tears already beginning. The rest of the Amis slowly filed in and they all made their way to the casket. A few others had shown up, art friends of Grantaire, old drinking buddies and those that Jehan, Bahorel and Grantaire would accompany to concerts. There were a few Enjolras didn’t recognize but he didn’t pay it much mind. He noticed Grantaire’s parents were nowhere to be found, _good_. They didn’t deserve to be there. 

 

The preacher’s sermon was beautiful but Enjolras was only able to focus on the casket and then, it happened. Courfeyrac obviously had not checked what Grantaire had actually PUT on his Ipod because the song that began to play in the middle of the sermon would never had made the cut. 

 

“SHAKE YA ASS. WATCH YOURSELF. SHAKE YA ASS. SHOW ME WATCHA WORKIN WITH…”

 

Courfeyrac was out his seat and running full speed into the church while Enjolras couldn’t help but erupt into laughter because this something _Grantaire would do_. He would try to make everything a joke and happy. And Enjolras was crying he was laughing so hard and everyone had begun to laugh and Courfeyrac was finally able to change the song to something by Mumford and Sons. Courfeyrac walks back out to find that even the preacher had started giggling. 

 

“Well, I can never say that that’s happened before,” the preacher begins again, “And being that you all know Grantaire it seems like something he would do, no?” There was a chorus of yes’s. Enjolras was confused; he knew Grantaire was an atheist. Why was he spending time with a preacher? One who new him well enough that this is a character trait of his. As if on cue the preacher says, 

 

“Some of you may not know this, but Grantaire would sometimes come by the church and help some of the kids after school with their homework and played music for them. It was appropriate...most of the time.” 

 

There was a flurry of giggles and chuckles. 

 

“As many of you probably know, the boy was not religious, however he is one of the purest and sweetest hearts I have ever met. He was a good a kid and it’s hard to see him gone so early.” The preacher choked up a bit on the end and wipes his eyes. 

 

“Would anyone like to say anything?” He asks sweetly.

 

Eponine stood first. She was more held together than she had been the last few days and she was even smiling, if not brokenly. 

 

“Grantaire was my best friend. We had met a pretty long time ago and I had always thought ‘man, this kid is going to get me in a lot of trouble one day.” There were a few laughs, “But instead, he brought me with him to a great group of people, the Les Amis, and we made so many good friends and our lives got so much better. I owe him that. I owe him so much and, more over, I loved R. He was always there for me, and he always will be.” Eponine smiles and steps down. Combeferre gathers her in a hug and she wipes her eyes again. 

 

Courfeyrac rises, along with Jehan and Bahorel. They each give their heartfelt stories of Grantaire and the love they each held for the man and Enjolras knew what he was going to say. What he really needed to say. 

 

Enjolras had never been one to be nervous about speaking. It was something he had always been so well gifted in. However, right now, going to the podium to tell these people about the love his life and how much he meant to him was the hardest thing he had ever done. 

 

“Grantaire was an idiot,” a beautiful start, “and maybe that’s why I loved him so much. Grantaire and I fought constantly and, if anything, it brought us closer together. Every time he argued with over politics, religion, who broke the coffee machine it didn’t really matter. He made me better in my pursuits for it. He was a beautiful artist and musician and he loved his friends more than anything in the world and we all loved him. Sometimes, he didn’t always believe it but I believe that he died knowing we all loved him. That I loved him with all my heart and he loved me too, and I think he was finally happy.”

There wasn’t a dry eye. Even Bahorel, who doesn’t show any type of “weakness” had tears rolling down his cheeks. Eponine was the first to hug him but it quickly turned into a group hug of the Amis. Enjolras didn’t oppose it, not this time. The casket was lowered after everyone placed a flower, Alstroemerias, Enjolras would later find. They represented the twists and turns in friendship, Jehan would say, but for now, they watched the casket lowered and it wasn’t until then that Enjolras noticed the headstone. It read Grantaire’s full name but under it was quote, he imagined Jehan had written it. 

 

“ _Although lost in the dark he found his light in his Apollo. Loved by his friends, and never forgotten._ ”

 

Enjolras didn’t have it in himself to cry again but he covered his mouth and closed his eyes. He hoped Grantaire could see him because it was in that moment that Enjolras was more determined than ever before to change the world.

**Author's Note:**

> So there it is, I'm sorry to rip your hearts but this will only last a little bit longer!! This WILL end happily, I promise! Come say hi on Tumblr at er-will-send-me-to-the-er.tumblr.com Also say hi to the beautiful lady who gave me the idea, castiels-heart.tumblr.com.
> 
> Also, if anyone could tell me why my italics never show up? That would be awesome because it just doesn't show up when I post for some reason.


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